Tuesday, July 30, 2002

long lost friend and birthday wishes

:) Got a call earlier this morning. A guy started belting out the birthday song soon as I said 'Hello'. The voice was oddly familiar, which is why I didn't stop him and tell him that he had the wrong number. You see, it's not my birthday. In fact, it's there's almost five whole months more before that day comes. And that's what I told Tim, my ex-landlord, now friend. Was nice of him to call all the way from Melbourne for the greeting, no matter how off the mark he was.

Later at about noon, while I was rushing for changes requested by the boss for a demo, a conversation bubble from MSN Messenger popped up with a greeting from someone named 'liz' going 'How are you doing woman?'. It's long lost Liz! I'd almost forgot I added her in my list in case she ever got Messenger. I only had her email address and she never did reply my mails. Finally, I found out that she's still alive and well and still studying in the States. The last time I spoke to her was when I called her when she was there three years back. Gosh! Time really flies.

Didn't really finish my conversation with her though. Kinda got logged off by Messenger. Must have looked really rude of me to log off in the midst of a conversation. Her icon indicates that she's away right now. Maybe I'll talk to her later.

Monday, July 29, 2002

It's been awhile. Haven't written anything of substance ... not that I write a lot of those anyways. :P

Anyways, nothing much was missed. Less frustration at the work place now cause we've decided to just start programming with the old engine. We will never know when the new engine will be completed; only the idiot does. So, am currently in the process of getting the database up and then begin Java. Hopefully, I'll will have something to show the client when they come in for the weekly progress meeting scheduled for every Friday at 3pm starting from this Friday. Great! Will start working on that soon as I finish this blog.

The HR Ministry's computer was sent back to them on Wednesday. The lady I deal with was pretty happy with the application. When I say pretty happy, I meant she didn't go 'It sucks!'. She follows my instructions pretty well and did things as she was supposed to ... while I was there. Hopefully she'd be able to use the application even when I'm not there. The application is pretty intuitive. Nothing fancy. Pretty easy to grasp. I don't forsee any problems unless some piece of coding turns out to be buggy.

On the non-work-related front, there's plans for a paintball weekend with some of the people at work (idiot excluded of course!). That should be good. I've been wanting to try that for ages. Ever since I've heard about it. Missed the one organised by the Malaysian Student Society back in Monash and was waiting for them to organise another trip for the second sememster but that didn't happen. :( So, to get to finally play it ... I only hope I'm not dissappointed and also that I won't turn out to be a dissappointment for my team. GO TEAM!

Finally bought the Java study guide. Yeps! I'm finally going to start studying for the exam. Exam's scheduled for 26/Aug, so that means I have about a month for preparation. Hope that's enough time. Otherwise, I'd just have to post-pone it ... yet again. I'm currently at page 12. A few hundred more pages to go. Then I'll have to look for mock tests and see how well I do on those. If I could beat the scores of those two co-workers from Cambridge who has taken the exam, that would be sweet. No easy job though, they both scored 88%.

What am I thinking? With the amount of time I think I'd be able to scrape up for study time. I'd be happy just to pass the exam! Much less beat the two smarty pants!

Thursday, July 25, 2002

Hmmm ... I keep thinking about food. Keep wanting to eat. I'm making myself hungry.

I wanna have 'bak kut teh'.

I wanna have banana fritters.

I wanna have Mamee Szechuan flavoured instant noodles. (which I actually have in my drawer right now ... hmmm, should I?)

Hopefully I'll be able to get the first one for lunch if everyone else agrees. *pray* *pray*

:) At this rate, I'm gonna be extremely vertically challenged, as you PC folks would put it. Me, I just say FAT!

Wednesday, July 24, 2002


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Sunday, July 21, 2002

Oh yes, I almost forgot!

I'm stuck with a programming problem. Anyone who've used JavaMail with JDBC please help me. I've posted the SOS at the Sun's forum but nobody's answered my plea as yet. Read the SOS here. Thanks.
the wedding gig

Well, just got back from the wedding gig. It was actually a complete disaster but since none too many of the guests knows much about Latin dancing they thought it was great! Multiple mistakes. Chunks of routine cut off, had to improvise so as to restart rountine, forgot routine after turning - froze for a sec! Steps completely went out of my head for a moment. Again ... nobody noticed. They thought it was brilliant. Good job then, eh? :)

Told mum about me wanting to apply for the Aussie PR. Surprisingly, she's quite supporting. However, she's got this idea that I should learn the line dances from the CD she got from a friend so that I could teach people on the side when I get there. Yups! The same idea when I told her about the working visa to the UKs. Not sure how practical that would be. How do I actually get people to teach? I can't just go to a park and then just start dancing. I'd look like a mad woman. Don't you think?

Anyways, need to find more information about the application. I know about the application fee but I've heard that you also have to deposit a certain amount of money to the govenment/a bank as surety that you have enough money to live for awhile when you get there? This information wasn't available in the immigration page nor the high commission's page. Guess I'd have to email/call them one day.

Besides that, did more whining about how much I hate my job - something I've been doing a lot, a lot, a lot this past few days.

Wednesday, July 17, 2002

I've been a total bitch at work to my idiot colleague this past few days. It is mainly due to the fact the deadline for my project is fast approaching and nothing concrete has yet been done for the project. When I say nothing concrete, I mean no application code has been written ... NONE AT ALL!

Why haven't I written anything?

Well ... the company's project for this line of application that we're pushing is suppose to be based on a framework. The old framework written by a colleague, who have since left for his PhD studies, is too rigid and limitting. We had to hack and find work arounds to get it to do the things we need. Not a very productive appication building process. Therefore, after we've finished with that project (app based on old framework), the idiot decided to modify/redesign/recode the framework.

I had at first thought that it would be a fabulous idea and even gave him input on what I'd like to be able to do with the new framework. What I didn't expect was for him to try to write everything by himself and not informing the rest of us on what he's up to, how far along he is, what features would be in it. Since he didn't tell us anything, I thought that he would have taken my input in and built the framework with what I have requested. BUT ... that is not the case, which I had the pleasure of finding out on Monday at approximately 6.30pm.

Feeling the pressure of a deadline and not being able to do anything with no framework, I had requested a discussion with the idiot to check on his progress and whether I should still wait for the new framework. Of course, I had checked with him prior to that on his progress almost weekly but everyweek was like 'I'll have something that you can code with by Friday'. That went on for several weeks with him not giving me anything at all. No interface, no class definitions, no function definitions ... no nothing! I had told him to at least give me the class and function definition so that at least I can have something to code with even though I can't test it as yet. It would be much faster and more productive to have something coded for the application while waiting for the framework to be completed so that when the framework is completed, we could test the application codes. Now, we're just sitting there WAITING.

It's true that most of us have other tiny projects at the same time and that we're not actually sitting on our buts staring into space but this is another one of our project and most importantly, a project for an outside client with a deadline of the end of July. Which would you prioritise? Impending deadline with income project or completing minor non-income earning projects?

Anyway, back to the discussion with the idiot.

So, I found out that the new framework wouldn't do what I had expected it would do, which is also the main reason I had been waiting for the new framework instead of the old one. Had I known this, I would have modified what I had wanted to do and did the project with the old framework. Fuck him for this! When asked when he would be able to finish the framework, he-who-always-ask-me-for-a-deadline-for-finishing-a-module-he-requested, said that he doesn't know. How dare he! I almost exploded. But instead I told him that that was not acceptable and that he has to give me a timeline otherwise I would have no idea how to proceed. The idiot replied that I can't push him for a timeline cause he doesn't know. Heck! I don't fucking know when I am able to finish modules as well but you pushed me for a freaking date and then don't accept it when I said I don't know and I had to give you one anyway and then I have to try to finish it be then. Why do you fucking expect me to accept an 'I don't know now?'

So, now, I still don't know when he's gonna finish. One thing I did was push him to give me the interface so that I can have something for the rest of the team to begin with. His deadline is today. By 5.30pm this evening, I'm expecting to see the interface. If he doesn't have it, I don't know what I'm going to do. I'd put the blame on him but since I'm in charge of the project, I'm to blame as well right?

*sigh* This is why for my next job, I just want a lowly programming job. Just tell me what you want coded and I'll code it for you. No thinking. No decisions. Less responsibility.

Monday, July 15, 2002

Finally saw Minority Report last night. Still can't decide whether I liked the show or not. High cool factor but ... I don't know. Something is keeping me from coming to a decision.

Saturday, July 13, 2002

ling finds me inspiring. Too bad none of my younger sisters seem to think that. I'm such a piss assed lousy sister.

Hey, ling, jason, you guys ever heard of MEETUP? I've sent in a suggestion to start a MEETUP in Malaysia yesterday so I don't know when it'll be approved or rejected. It would be lovely to meet up with you guys.

Ling, we have so much in common! I'd like to ditch the 'working' part and travel the world too. Work to me is a necessary evil!
While sending my sister off to the Equatorial earlier tonight, we had a long chat. To her it would probably have sounded more like a lecture but I was just telling her what the parental unit's fretting about.

Basically the whole conversation was about me asking her what she's planning to do, what she's up to. She's quit school and she didn't even complete a semester (I thought she had!). She says that she has approached a sportwriter for help in securing scholarships from Ivy league schools. I told her that it's kinda difficult to get scholarships from such schools as I've read on Princeton's (I think) site that they do not give out scholarships, especially sports scholarships. Then I hounded her on whether she's looking for any scholarships on her own and not just relying on the writer. I couldn't get a straight answer from her.

Conclusion was that she doesn't really know what she wants to do except that she'd like something that involves the study of the body - biology. According to her, she couldn't find any information about science courses, which is surprising cause that's usually the courses that I see when I surf University sites. I don't know what site she's been looking at.

I advised her to take a basic science based pre-university program so that at least moms and pops won't get on her case so much. She mooted the idea saying that she can't concentrate on studies if she doesn't know what she's studying for towards the end. Told her that the sort of pre-university programs that I've suggested doesn't really require her to have an exact field of study but she said that not how she works. *shrugs*

She also went on about how the family doesn't support her squash and her school achievements. It's true, my family's not big on compliments. But she knows this and I know this. All the sibs knows this so why does she have to be so sensitive about i? If they don't gush about your achievement, why get so dissappointed if the react as they always do? So, I told her not to get so worked up if they don't go ohh-ahh. I should know, after almost 25 years, I've had my share of non-compliments. All my ballet honours, my As in art have been for nought cause those are just not what they consider important. Not what will support you in your adult life. Not practical.

I told her that sometimes, you have to sacrifice things that you like to do (things that won't kill you if you don't do it) for things that your parents think you should do (that won't kill you either and that you don't really mind too much). Basically be practical. That's what I have done. If this had been an idea world, I'd have been a dancer and an artist. Since it isn't, I've given up art (something I found I don't mind just doing for fun) after Form 3 to take do the science stre am for the rest of secondary school and continued on to do computers in uni. Dance, I had a 6 years hiatus (due to financial dependence) until I couldn't stand it any longer and just had to take up some kind of dance form or I'd go mad. Latin isn't my first choice, I'd have rather gone back to ballet but cause my mom didn't like the idea, I didn't do it. Didn't want the cold war that might happen if I'd gone against her wishes. My sister says she couldn't do what I did. She can't just give up squash for she might regret it later if she had.

So, this made me think about what I have given up and whether I do regret giving up those things that I loved. I DO! I regret it a lot. What could I have done? I didn't have money to continue with classes. I was 15. Nobody hires 15 year olds. I had to give ballet up! As for art. How was I to study that if my parents won't pay for it? Malaysia does not have a scheme where you can just go to university almost free and then repay it after you've graduated and got a job. She has the luxury to continue squash cause she gets paid to play.

*SIGH*

This makes me feel ... I don't know ... like I'm conforming a lot a lot. Just doing what my parents tells me to do - almost. Sometimes I do resent my parents for not allowing my to do what I really want. But I've never told them that. I'm thinking that I have to take responsibility for it as well. I mean if I didn't want to do as they asked, they probably wouldn't have disowned me or thrown me out or anything like that. If I had taken a stand and really insisted that I really trully want to do it, the might eventually relent. I think I just did as they asked cause I could throw it back at them if I really hate what I do eventually and blame them.

*SIGH*

I would really like to, just once, do something life changing that they might oppose but I'd do it anyway. I might fail or I might succeed but at least I know it was all me. I made the decision. ALL ME.

Friday, July 12, 2002

puter's kaput

News from the homefront. Papa just called asking if I'd used the puter last night (I did) cause he can't seem to start it up today. The puter starts booting and the at percisely 27%, it hangs. He's tried it three times with the same result. Oh oh!

Must check it out soon as I get home.

Thursday, July 11, 2002

post-mortem

After ballroom class last night, went through the latin routine SM for a short, really short, time. He's trying to get a gig for us for his bosses sister's something. The last gig we had was slightly after the March competition ie. early April.

It was his birthday yesterday and some people at the studio bought cake and we celebrated.

Coach came in after most of us ate the cake (thank goodness!) and while we were looking at the pictures taken on Sunday. Lots of pictures on the ballroom couples and not too many on us latin couples. I think there are about three more with me in it - all pictures of my 'lovely' back and gorgeous hair.

So, the coach, while having his cake, started disecting our moves based on the pictures. Lots on the ballroom couples cause they had more pictures.

A few comments on our pictures:
- picture not included Need to straighten my arm when we're both facing opposite sites, back-to-back but with hand hold. Required to feel position of partners' body.
- refer top picture SM looks like he's doing social dancing while I was trying to go all out.
- refer bottom picture SM too straight and need rounder arms. Me, right knees 'rest' on top part of calf just below the back of the left knee plus don't turn out supporting leg so much.
- no pictures but seen by all My stumble after my spins! They said I did that twice but I only really remembered one. Even at that time I was thinking 'Shit! What the heck happened?! Did I put too much force in my spins? Did SM pushed too hard?' I couldn't figure it out at that time and I still don't know what happened. Maybe I just lost balance. Spinning and then stopping is one of my weakest moves. Why in the world did the coach put so many of them in our routine is beyond me. Anyone with tips on how to stop really solidly after spins, feel free to email me or leave a comment.

other matters
Got a call earlier from Anne. I've been drafted again to play squash for the company. She called to inform that training will begin in August and that the company games is on Oct 26 & 27. *sigh* Haven't played any since the last company games. Oh yeah! Most likes, I won't be playing number one ladies for the team this time. They've got Carrie Yeo to join. She was one of the national players way back when I was playing juniors. Didn't even know she was with the company but then it is a really large company ... I mean, group of companies.

Have been thinking again of just packing and going off somewhere far far away for a long long time. Maybe just work as a waitress somewhere and not have to think so much. Thing is, I don't think waitressing would pay for all the lessons that I still want to take. So, still need a good paying job. Location options right now are 1) get an Aussie PR and go back to Merlbourne (yups! still dreaming of going back!) and 2) get the working-tourist visa to UK, bum around for about 2 years then come back. Problem with option 2 is that I can only work 25 hour week. How am I going to get enough money for rent and food? Option 1, what if they reject my application? That would be a few thousand down the drain.

Really should do something about it rather than talk, think and yearn about it. I figured, I need at least RM25,000 before I can seriously consider those options. That would take me a few more months? A year?

If I really, really can't stand this company anymore, I'd say 'FUCK IT' and just resign. Bleeding company requires 3 months notice! Can you believe it?

Tuesday, July 09, 2002

Some pictures from the competition






P.S: Jason, so, was I the fat girl that you were laughing at during the Millennium?

Monday, July 08, 2002

Oh yeah! If anyone reading this (are there people reading this???), was at the competition yesterday? There was a jive song that they played and the singer sounded a lot like Scotty Morris of the Big Bad Voodoo Daddy. Can anyone confirm? Just curious.

Okay so, nothing seems to be up for the next few months. Time to catch up on my movies. Dying to watch 'Minority Report'. Time travel, one of my favourite topic, and Tom Cruise ... how bad can it be? ;) Also, that French flick at the International Screen, 'The Taste of Others' I think it's called. Sounds interesting. Hope it's still playing.
semi-finals ... again

Competition yesterday was utterly tiring for me and I'm only doing two dances; cha-cha and jive. Outcome wasn't too bad. Managed to get into the semi-finals of the Novice category. I'm happy enough ... at least we didn't get kicked out in the heats! :)

So, this time around, we had to dance in the heats, the quarter finals and the semi finals. As compared to the Millennium competition back in March where we danced only twice, the heats and then the semi-finals. Must try and get into the finals the next time round.

The day was great even though I was tired before we even began, thanks to the 5 hour hair braiding that I did for my hair which ended with me finally going to bed at 3am. Then waking up at 8am. *yawn* Dance floor was much better than the one at the Istana Hotel, although a little sticky but the Ballroom was much better at the Istana, looked grander, so was the washroom. Washroom at the Wisma PGRM (venue) is not very make-up friendly, too dark, dim. It's lucky that I brought a mirror along so the girls could put on their make-up at the changing room (a hall on the opposite side on the competition hall) instead of in the washroom.

Plenty of people = plenty of people watching opportunity.

My favourite watch would be one of the adjudicators. While all of the other adjudicators would be serious, standing still or walking about looking at the competitors, this one was tapping his foot, moving to the music and even once, I caught him mouthing to the song that was playing. :) One thing I noticed, where the other adjudicatos usually take turns in judging the competition, he judged almost all the competition save a few in the afternoon. He definitely judged all the competition in the evening. Poor guy. His feet must have hurt from standing all day. Well, at least he looked good doing it. He had on a beige jacket for the afternoon session and the a quick change into a jacket with mandarin collar with some sort of cravat? or kerchief tied around the neck. Very nice. Very stylish. Mucho yummy!

Anyway, Darren Bennett and Lilia Kopylova was back again. So, I had an eyefull of gorgeous dancing by the couple. Also had fun watching couple no. 1. I don't remember what their names were but they were really good too. I really liked their paso doble. Really strong and with brilliant dramatic expression. In my opinion, they did better in the paso than Darren and Lilia. However, I really like Darren and Lilia's samba. Boy of boy can Lilia really shake that hip of hers. Amazing.

Lastly, I do not agree with the decision of the judges on one of the finalist in the Amateur Latin section. It was an Australian couple and their dancing was not that great. Several of the other asian dancers were better than them but they got in. I don't understand it. Or rather I do but I don't agree with it. Judges here seems to like putting foreigners into finals no matter if the other asians were better. If the asians were not significantly obviously better, chances are, the foreign couple would make it to the finals.

But hey! What do I know? I'm only a Novice.

Friday, July 05, 2002

I like this. Go read it.

Thursday, July 04, 2002

I think I will stop tinkling with the PHP app now. Otherwise it's never finish. I keep going ... "hey! It'll be nicer this way wouldn't it?" and "hey! Let's try it this way." and "let's add this in". Keep trying to improve upon it non-stop. Guess I'm very much an end-user huh? Always asking for more.

As theendoffree continues on reporting all the freebie sites that are converting to fee-based sites, the real world seems to be going in the opposite direction. This past week, from out of nowhere, I received two freebies.

Freebie 1 - A translucent covered cheque holder and a JUMBO pen from my bank. According to the accompanying letter, it was an early bird gift. I don't remember being an early bird when I started that account a couple of months ago but it's great. Keep the freebies coming Maybank.

Freebie 2 - This one's totally unexpected. My colleagues and I were sitting at a kopitiam (coffee shop) at Taman SEA having lunch when all of a sudden, a hoard of females promoters barged into the shop with their white t-shirt tied on the waist to show some skin and tight black miniskirts and started to hand out something encased in a thin layer of plastic to everyone in the shop. The parcel was a pair of sunshades. It's a promotion for a beer. I don't remember which. Anchor? Heinneken? Carlsberg? I don't really drink beer so I don't remember which it was. Thing is, I was just talking to Vi from the studio about sunshades on Sunday, about how she's got loads at her office and I don't have any in my car, and here I am being handed a pair on Tuesday.

Wow! Easily pleased aren't I. Heh heh. If you only knew. But freebies are always great. So keep them coming. Can't wait to see what else I'll be getting next week.

Tuesday, July 02, 2002

Deadline's come and gone and I'm still not done with the codes. Well, not as done as I like it to be anyway. Need to do some cleaning up and then sort of test it.

I'm not very familiar with testing programs. Not sure what to test it besides making sure everything suppose to come out right and limits tests. All the stress test and performance testing stuff; I haven't a clue. Should try and get a clue though.

'sides that, practise still going on in the dancing front. Only five more days before the competition on Sunday.

Still not satisfied with my routine. I need to learn how to stop after spins!!! And there's so many spins in my routine? I don't know what my teacher was thinking when he choreographed it. I know it's nice/flashy to have spins but what good is it if you can't do it well?

Dress rehearsal for all competitors tomorrow at the studio.

Oh yeah, if anyone's going to the competition, scream for couple number 47 ... or was it 46. I think it's 47.

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